Leaving New York Current mood: touched I can not believe that two months has already flown by. It seems like just yesterday I was staying in a little hotel room, scared to death in Poughkeepsie. I was worried that I wouldn't fit in, worried that I wouldn't be able to do the job, worried that I was too inexperienced. Getting set up and ready to go was so akward and I had to be strong and just suck it up. So many faces.. I couldn't even remember them all. I just wanted to set up my little apartment. Heh... I hated it as soon as I walked in. It was so trashy and so gross, but doable for the next two months. I met me roommate Megan and she was so nice. We got along great and we would talk about books, religion, family, and such while everyone else sat at the picnic table drinking and recounting their theatre tales.But soon we lost our shyness and soon we were out there enjoying the company of everyone else. Well.. to an extent! There were a few people I just couldn't stand and it seemed as though most of the conversations always ended back at Penis Size. hahaha. I've learned so much over this summer. Perhaps not about Costuiming so much but about life and about people. I've had to become so patient, so calm, so forgiving, and so much more open. I have regained a sense of wonder and appreciation for the life and world around us. I once more see the magic that is in everything. I'd forgotten my childhood friends of fairies and dragons. Life again holds a sort of enchanment, excitement, and joy thanks to Patt, my supervisor. I've come to appreciate people and be more tolerant of others. I've questioned so much about my religion and discovered so much more. I'm still learning, still trying to understand. For example... Patrick. Patrick became one of my best friends in New York. He is a props guy. He's super fun. He also happens to be gay. In christianity we're taught to love the sinner, hate the sin. And in christianity, homosexuality is a sin. Being republican I've always been against same-sex marriages and things along those lines. Believing that homosexuality is a choice. Now.. my mind is boggled and in a complete state of confusion. I see Patrick and how much he loves and cares for his Boyfriend and I wonder. Aren't we supposed to love one another? How can love be wrong? Aren't we all humans? Don't we all deserve the same things as the next person? Who am I to deny someone the right to marriage? Who am I to deny someone the chance to love and have a family? ... Patrick is awesome and he like everyone else deserves the best. The conflict within my heart and mind are raging. I'm not quite sure what to believe. Somehow.. somewhere.. someone is wrong and someone is right. But who? The shows were awesome. I met some great people. I met some horrible ones too. But each show was important and touched me in some form or another. I saw and worked on shows that I know someday will be on Broadway. I'm glad to have worked on them and to be exposed to such interesting minds. I was watching a movie the other night and laughed when i recognized someone I had met over the summer. I'm three degrees seperated from Will Ferrel and Ben Stiller. hahaha. The friends I made though were the most important. So many, I can't even begin to name them. Some I know better than others, some i'd like to get to know better. Sadly I might never see some of them again. It's bittersweet these summer theatre programs. You become so close to people, and before you know it, you're pulled away. I'll miss them all so much. I hope that our paths cross once again. But we had some good times. We had some wild and crazy times. We had some hard times. They were all worth it.