Friday, July 26, 2002

A Project from God

Just a couple weeks ago, my mother had an inspiration from God to concentrate on the Ten Commandments. Not only to just teach them to people she met and really understand them, but to teach the children of the world. So now, she is writing children books about the Ten Commandments and she has asked me to be her illustrater! Sweetness!! So far she has written the first book and I have a few of the drawings done. Hopefully I will have them finished within the next couple weeks. I am so excited about this. Now I really feel like I'm helping and doing something for God. Plus it's something that I know how to do and something I like doing. At times it can be hard, but with God's help... all will be good and these books will be a blessing to everyone. We are working on a website, getting ready so we can sell and advertise once we have the first one completed. The site is at www.geocities.com/sofine_inc/ It's still in it's beginning stage but we will be adding to it. Yay!

Wednesday, July 24, 2002

A great Concert

Last Night I went to my fourth concert and it was none other than that fabulous band, Tool! Yeah that's right. I got to go see Tool. I've been wanting to go see them so bad! Last year they came around the same time but I couldn't go because I was out of the country. I finally got to go! YAY! And what a show it was. First we had to sit through a horrible band called "Tomahawk." I mean these guys were aweful! I don't know who would voluntarily listen to that band. Then while we waited for Tool, a bunch of girls down in the pit area flashed everyone and of course all the guys got all excited about that. Then .... the show started! Not only did they open with a great song, it was the first song that I ever heard from Tool,... "Sober" They had two screens on both sides of the stage where they played different kinds of media images. Tool always has the wierdest stuff. It was kewl b/c during alot of their songs, they played clips from their music videos as well! hehehe. The lighting rocked, the backdrops were awesome, and they even had these spiffen balloon balls that hovered in the air. It was just so kewl! The lead singer of Tool is so weird too. He started off dressed... then he took of his shirt to reveal a fully stuffed black bra, and eventually took off his pants to display his matching undies. Yeah... quite interesting indeed. For the most part Tool had a great show and played many great songs. I quite enjoyed the concert and am so glad that I had the opportunity to go. Maybe I'll go again next time. Go Tool!!

Sunday, July 21, 2002

Feeling at home vs. Feelings of Hell

So for the past two weeks... err.. well the past week I guess you could say. I've been going back to the Pentecostal Church. And so far, I really love it. For the most part, people are friendly, say hello, and want to talk to me. Some people who I never talked to before have even started talking to me. For example, Samantha's cousin Ryan, Kim, Aaron, Todd, Kevin, and some of the other youth group people. The best part about it is, I was seriously looking for a place to call my spiritual home. I feel that my faith has been slipping away and that I didn't want to really work to be a christian anymore. I knew that something was wrong so I needed that hunger again that I once had. And I've found it! Everyone has openly welcomed me back into the church family and are so happy for me to be there. Ryan even once asked, "So are you going to stay or are you going to do one of your dissappearing acts again?" It made me feel like someone actually cared about me and wanted me to be there. Plus, my friend Jiulie goes there now. So I finally have a friend. Someone whom I can converse with, spend time with, and have fun with. It's great. Another great thing that just sort of made me feel like it was right to go back was that day I went back, they anounced a Youth Choir starting. And the Lord knows how much I love to sing and singing for Him is the best! Though there are good things.. there will always be bad things. But I have to realize that no matter where I go, there will be bad things and that it isn't necesarrily the people, but spirits.
I did say that some of the people are starting to talk to me, but there are others that well.. totally ignore me. For example, Kevin. He comes to talk to her, shakes her hand and proclaims, "I have to come and shake everyones hand"... then doesnt even give me a second look, a smile, or a handshake. Another person who ignores me is Derek. We sort of went out for like a week last year. He liked me and I liked him. We talked for that week and stuff but I just didn't feel right so I broke it off. Ever since then he doesn't talk to me, or look at me. I don't know what's up with that.. but I really don't care. But the thing that hurts me the most is Samantha. She just got married in May, I went to her wedding, went to her bridal shower, bought her stuff and everything. Sure I didn't and still don't approve of her marriage but I understand that is what she wanted to do and I really have no say in the matter. And it's not like I ever told her to her face or supported her. I've been their for her and helped out. Well I've trued to call her so we can hang out and talk, because well.. she was my best friend. But she never calls me back. So she saw me at church this morning but as soon as service was over she just ran off. She didn't even come say hi to me. And she did the same thing tonight. I had to run after her just to say hello. I'm sorry but that just isn't right. I guess she is too caught up with her new married life to want me in there. And just some of the stuff she said to me.. really made me feel unwelcome. She says she misses me, but I highly doubt it. And the last part is sort of rough as well. One of the reasons I left the UPC is b/c of Aaron but that is a whole other blog in itself.